dtglah wahai kekuatan...

Assalamualaikum...

Dear diary,

feel like writing something today..i have 2 weeks more..to gather all the STRENGTH remain in me..to ask ONE BIG THING, to my parents..janji harus ditepati..yah..yahh...am i strong enough to ask them, without any support from anyone..not even my sis, who, i owez thought wud be here with me to make things easier..i never thought things will turn out like this..huhuhuhu~

rase bersalah dgn Allah, diri sendiri, malu dgn org sekeliling...for all bad things i did the whole year.. i know it's wrong..if only i knew about this, i wouldn't let myself get into it..how come, i never knew about it before?of all good things i learned, i never knew about this..how JAHIL i was. in fact, i'm JAHIL in many things..dulu dan skrg..

"bercouple itu haram" - full stop. i did some research on the internet, and from any sources which can lead me to an acceptable answer. many opinions. many ideas. many fights.but i can say that - i agree with the above statement.

sedikit flashback..i think, keadaan sekeliling sgtlah membahayakn utk org islam yg x berilmu pengetahuan, yg skdr beramal ikut org lain, ikut ape yg org praktik kt asrama..ikut ape yg org2 tua buat...w/out asking the relevance of what we are doing.. dan SAYA adelah : boleh dikatekn org seperti itu..i do what i think is right.. BUT most of the time , what i think IS RIGHT, is not that RIGHT..

i never knew bercouple itu haram..when i'm into the situation [of what people call 'bercouple'].. barulah sy tahu yg bercouple itu haram. So, if you were in my place ... what IS your decision NEXT??
keadaan sekeliling dah merubah ramai org utk memandang baik ape yg kite buat..smpai kdg2 kite lupe yg mana 1 halal n yg mana 1 hrm..sdgkn= yg HALAL itu NYATA, yg HARAM itu NYATA..

and my weakness IS: i am not good in conveying WHAT I KNOW to those who don't know. seriously, I AM NOT GOOD at it. utk mnyampaikn ilmu baru ini, kelebihan 'tabligh' itu xde dlm diri ni..i myself did mistakes, terase malu utk mnympaikn sesuatu yg kite sndiri buat..walaupun niat tu slalu ade dlm hati..

x nak ckp pnjg2 psl ni, cume berharap KEKUATAN itu dtg utk melangkah lebih berani, n semoga usaha yg akan dtg ini mdapat berkat n redha ALLAH s.w.t..AMIN...AMIN..AMIN...